13 Things That Wake Me Up

I´m super sleep deprived these days and it isn´t just because I have a newborn. I thought I´d jot down all the annoying things that wake me up in the middle of the night . . . or day, if I happen to be trying to take a nap!

 1. Dante. He´s 6 weeks old, what can I say? But he only gets me up 2x in the night.

 2. Dorian. Old enough to sleep through the night at 19 months, but does he? Oh, nooooooooo! He usually times his waking to right after Dante has gone to sleep after his 3 am feeding, which is why I am normally up from 3 am on.

 3. Roosters. The darn things don´t crow at dawn around here, they crow whenever they feel like it and it would seem that the majority of them have insomnia.

 4. Irving. He snores. Loudly. If we had a couch, he´d be sleeping on it, but since we don´t, I sleep upside down in the bed to get as far away from it as possible. I used to sleep on the floor in Dorian´s room, but that just kept Dorian awake. (apparently I snore, too!)

 5. Having to pee. I thought the bladder problem ended after pregnancy, but I guess when you have two kids back to back, something has to fail!

 6. The neighbor´s dog. This darn mutt comes around most nights, nosing at the garbage, knocking dishes into the pila if we forget to put them out of reach and generally being a nuisance. It once even bumped Dorian´s door open and went inside!

 7. Weird waking dreams. You´re going to think I´m nuts, but sometimes I dream that there is a snake or zillions of ants in the bed and only half wake up, so I am acting, but still dreaming. So I will jump up, seeing the snake in the bed. I yell for Irving to get out quickly, or start swatting at imaginary insects. He thinks it is hilarious. But once there really was a centipede in the bed and it stung me and ran under his pillow and he didn´t believe it was real and just rolled over to go back to sleep! It took a lot of convincing to get him to get up and kill the rotten critter.

 8. Irving´s brother, Melvin. He shows up during my naps. Never fails. He comes to use the internet, because the nearest internet cafe is three blocks away and that is just too far to walk (oh, yeah and we only charge him a trip to the store!). Problem is, he´s 14, loves games and frequently downloads viruses onto Irving´s computer.

 9. The neighbor´s kids. The other neighbor, not the ones with the dog. These guys live right behind us and their kids are all small and loud. I think they must have about ten families living in that hut, they sure make a ruckus, and their kids never seem to have naps. And they are up until midnight.

 10. Flies. During the day, we have a lot of flies buzzing around, thanks to Dorian´s rather messy eating habits (sticky little handprints EVERYWHERE). So, about five am, the sun comes up and they all wake up and start zipping around the room, waking me up.

 11. Hunger. Even if I eat a big supper, I´m always hungry early (four or five) in the morning. It´s ridiculous. I think my body figures I´m still pregnant. And I still look it, since I´m eating way too much!

 12. Irving´s cell phone alarm. He doesn´t actually get up until 7:10, but his alarm is set to go off at 6:00. And he just hits snooze, so it goes off every ten minutes for an hour. VERY annoying!

 13. Violent actions. This may sound weird, but when I sleep, I get kind of violent. Sometimes, one of my kicks or punches will actually wake me up . . . usually when my knuckles come in contact with the stucco wall. I can´t tell you how many mornings I have woken up with bleeding knuckles from that darn wall! (don´t worry, Irving is used to this and has gotten accustomed to blocking punches in his sleep. And occasionally throwing himself out of bed to escape!)

 Well, by now you probably realize that I am a super light sleeper. And I wonder where my kids get it from. Sigh. Someday, I´ll build myself a soundproof room, when the kids are old enough to sleep through the night (in about twenty years!) and get myself a good night´s sleep.

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